DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married for 18 years. It’s a second marriage for both of us. He cheated on his ex with me. Soon after we were married, he told me that, given the chance, he would cheat on me, but that I shouldn’t worry because no really pretty woman would ever want him.

Six years into our marriage, I needed to find something on his phone and saw he had signed up on a dating website for married people looking to cheat. We went to counseling. He said he wasn’t planning on following through; he just wanted to see what was out there.

Not long afterward, I noticed he had checked a website for dating foreign women, but he needed a credit card, so he gave up. Off to counseling again. I told him that was strike two.

Last month, I went on vacation with my daughter. Last week, he accidentally deleted something on his phone and asked me to find it. What I also found were emails from women offering their services, all of them sent while I was away. (“Send money, I’ll send more titillating photos.”) He claims he didn’t ask for them. There are eight or 10. My question: Is this strike three? — FOOLISH LADY IN MARYLAND

DEAR LADY: It should be obvious to you by now that your husband isn’t interested in being faithful. If you’re looking for a reason to leave him, this is strike three. If not, it’s strike 2 1/2. (Please get yourself tested for STDs.)

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MORE FROM DEAR ABBY:

Dear Abby: Man is unnerved by scantily clad stepdaughter

Dear Abby: Could my easygoing jocularity somehow make people think it’s okay to be rude to me?

Dear Abby: My husband isn’t into ‘trying’ to have a baby, he’d only be fine with it if it ‘just happened’

Dear Abby: My half-sister will not come to visit me, but she’ll pack a bag to travel with friends

Dear Abby: Our sexist financial adviser repeatedly calls and asks to speak to my husband

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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